Real Housewives of New York: Holidazed and Confused.

What can I say about this show?

I have been absent for so many weeks and now we are in the middle of the downwards spiral of Bethenny.

I had to go back and see when the last time I blogged was.  I’m happy to see that I did blog at least 2 weeks.  I have every intention to blog this show and each Wednesday would come and each Wednesday would go.  Then I would decide that I would attempt a double blog.  Then each Wednesday would come, and each Wednesday would go.

So, like all major decisions I make, I said “F it”. Let’s just do this”.  If only I had accepted Joe’s proposal in this manner.

Anyways, I want to rewind a tiny bit.  I do have some thoughts on the ladies this season.  What I do appreciate about this show is that even though this is one of the bigger casts, all of the ladies bring something to the table. Sonja is eight shades of crazy and we see it in every episode by her interactions with pretty much anyone.

Tinsley is anything but an adult.  I was pro Tinsley until she collapsed on command.  Ramona is probably the only housewife (I wanted to write Character) that stays true to who she is.  Ramona from season 1 is the same Ramona that is in this season.  It is remarkable.

Dorinda is bringing a shade of sad this season.  When she is sober, she is a quirky voice of reason.  When she is drunk, her darkness seeps out like lava and it can be uncomfortable to watch.

Bethenny, although sanctimonious is doing great work down in Puerto Rico but I am starting to think that she thinks this absolves her from all of her past behavior.

Carol is on a fashion crusade and since her debut on the show, we are seeing the most of her personality this year.

Last but not least, we have Luann who made it known that if she is a loser that we should all feel bad.  Can we all agree that tonight’s episode seemed like an hour long foreshadow to her inevitable arrest. What I think of Luann is that I think that she is not dealing with her divorce as well as she wants us to think and I’m not referring to her arrest. I’m referring to the fact that anytime anyone either brings up Tom or she runs into someone from his life, she looks INCREDIBLY uncomfortable. She gets quiet and tries to pump her own tires.  That is also a little uncomfortable.

So, let’s get into tonight’s show!

We start where we left last week which is in the Berkshires. Carol and Bethenny are having the softest yelling match known to man.  For some reason Bethenny keeps asking Carol to keep her voice down despite the fact that if Carol talks above a whisper, the velocity of a scream will blow her down.

The ladies are loving the fight (well, Tinsley and Ramona are).  They enjoy that Carol can hold her own against Bethenny.  After listening to both sides, they are both in the wrong.  Carol doesn’t support Bethany’s Puerto Rico crusade and Bethenny doesn’t support Carol in her endeavours.  The problem is that Bethenny thinks she is more important because of her charity work so will never see that she did anything wrong.

Bethenny does try to make a point but Carol shuts it down not before Luann gets drunk and starts to chime in.  She lets it be known that she doesn’t care about Adam. When Carol tells her, no one cares about Luann’s opinion.  Luann again drunkenly reminds her that Carol met Adam in her kitchen and that he dated her niece for 6 months.

I’m with Carol here because, really, who cares.  Except, both Bethenny and Luann believe that Adam is an ‘operator’ (lamest insult).  Tinsley backs her BFF and points out that he was with Carol for 3 years. Bitter Luann says, ‘it takes as long as it takes’.  Ok, fine, if that is true and Adam is an ‘operator’, what fame or status has he achieved exactly.  Can someone out there even tell me what his last name is?

Needless to say, the reason I mention Luann is chiming in is because her voice is so deep and gravelly that it cuts through ice and because Carol lets it be known that Bethenny had called Lu a loser at some point in a text message.

Bethenny is horrified by this and Lu took that like a badge of honour.  She let us know SEVERAL times that she ain’t no loser and if she is one, we should all feel bad about ourselves.  I can one thing, she ain’t a winner either.

Lu confronts Bethenny telling her she doesn’t care what B thinks, so Bethenny responds by asking if Lu cares she has lipstick on her face and then they were fine. As though, that is the magic question.

Dorinda didn’t like the tension in the house, so she brings out her own birthday cake and prompts all to sing to her.  Rather than blow out the candles, she dunks her face right into the cake and Siggy fell off her chair somewhere in Jersey.

I thought Dorinda was nuts but sure enough, the ladies take a deep dive into drunkenness and we are privy to a naked Bethenny trying to change into her holiday onesie and Dorinda trying to climb in along with her.  After a little topless wrestling, Dorinda steals an outfit and heads over to Carol.  Bethenny stumbles along and Dorinda leaves the ladies to hash things out.

All the while Carol and Bethenny find some common ground, the rest of the troop lap dance, wrestle and cackle.  You would think the most obnoxious one would be Sonja but no, true to the foreshadowing that is happening, Luann is the craziest in attendance.  The woman has got some moves, let me tell ya.

We wake the next morning, in our outfits from the night before and a little make up smudged but all in all, the ladies were fine. So, they head back to the city.

While in the city, we get to see the ladies dealing with their day to day which includes Sonja still prepping her home for renting when she has her handy man pay a visit.  I wonder if this contractor has ever been to her place before as she requests to fix a sink she broke in 2008 from —- having sex on it. Yes, both you, me and the contractor had to learn from Sonja’s mouth that she had sex on the sink in the service quarters.  Great, like I needed that visual.

We hop over to Bethenny’s place and pathetically watch her try to light a fire. Even though I don’t recall this from any year before, Bethenny hosts an annual Christmas Lunch.

Perhaps in the past nothing much has happened which is I don’t recall this but this year, there was tons of shade being thrown at Bethenny after the fact.

All of the ladies came and played the saddest game of Secret Santa.  They are all supposed to either pick a present from the pile or steal one they see.   They all opened their gifts and then.. kept them.  Kind of not the point of the game but whatever.

In effort to keep the foreshadowing rolling, Luann lets the ladies know she is going to Jupiter, Florida to spend Christmas with her brother and we all heard a collective gasp.  All the ladies agree that it isn’t such a great idea for Luann to head back to the place where she got married last year and that is when Bethenny dropped that Tom has a girlfriend. Luann did what Luann does best and pretend she if fine while her face went 8 shades of red.  In her confessional, she actually let some emotion be seen and called Tom a Dick.

She credits him for moving on too quick. I don’ think that is it myself. I think Tom is a huge man baby and much like the movie Jerry Maguire, he has a lot of girlfriends but is really bad at intimacy. He cannot be alone.

As the party continues, Bethenny gets a surprise gift of a nutcracker from Dorinda and despite being over the moon, Bethenny never outright thanked Dorinda.  Then, when Ramona was talking about her anti-aging skin care line, Bethenny knocked it down by asking if Ramona was performing an infomercial.  Finally, after Carol left, Bethenny asks the room if anyone else thought that Carol seemed sad.

Honestly, I didn’t think any of these things were out of the blue. She was excited about Dorinda’s gift, she makes fun of Ramona every time Ramona talks and well, asking if someone seemed sad isn’t necessarily a dig.

However, almost all the ladies left the lunch with an axe to grind.

Luann has also been rolling up her sleeves and helping out hurricane victims in Florida.  This resulted in her getting closer with the Red Cross, so Luann thought in the season of giving that she would organize a blood drive.  While her intentions were honorable, the ladies acted without class.

Despite attending for a good cause, the ladies spent their time gossiping mainly about Bethenny.  Luann was upset that Bethenny couldn’t find the time to donate blood. (this is the one time I believe that Bethenny can play the Puerto Rico card. She has done her part and her family needs her).

Sonja showed up to a blood drive in a sequin dress (naturally) and claimed she was helping the donors but really, she spent a good portion of her time horrifying the patrons.

Carol, who is too under-weight to donate blood, cornered Ramona to find out what was said about her at the Holiday Lunch.   Ramona divulges all of Bethenny’s concerns regarding Carol’s emotional well-being. Carol was put off by Bethenny’s concern and flipped the table. She said that it is Bethenny the one that is sad and lonely.  Carol furthers her argument and reminds Ramona how un-supportive Bethenny was when Ramona mentioned her skin care line.  All of the sudden Carol is transforming into a puppet master before our eyes.

I say this because the next day Bethenny phones Ramona, of all people.  Turns out that Sonja went running from the Blood drive straight over to Bethenny (makes sense as Bethenny is her only supporter) and tells her all that was gossiped about. Bethenny is hurt by the ladies gossiping about her so she phones Ramona to start patching things up except Ramona will have none of that. Carol got to Ramona first and fired her up.  Ramona points out what a shitty friend Bethenny is and hangs up on her…. ouch. I don’t care who you are, that would suck.

As mentioned, this show was hour long foreshadowing to Luann’s inevitable arrest.  After Ramona stomped all over Bethenny, we are in Luann’s new furnished penthouse apartment.  It is right before Christmas and her realtor is paying her a visit to toast to the new digs.  Luann is coming off strong and confident and excited for the next chapter in her life when….

They show across the screen: 48 Hours Later.

They show us all the dirty details of the arrest video. We see her threaten to kill the police. We see her wiggle out of the handcuffs and we see her pleading with the police while she keeps trying to climb out of the car. We end the show with a clip of her arraignment.

Next week, we live the aftermath of all that happened.  While some of the ladies are supportive of Lu, others are reveling in her misery.  Til then… Find me on twitter!!


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