Real Housewives of New York: Life is a Cabaret… Season Finale

Well, we have reached the end of an almost perfect housewife season.  We had fights, retribution, arrests and a near death experience.   We had it all!

The season started with Dorinda coming for Sonja and finishing with Luann.  Bethenny and Carole drew a line in the sand and the public is divided.  It is episodes like this week that make me wish, I had a video or recording of some sort because there is just soo much to comment on and I don’t feel like it is truly all captured here.

So how did it finish?

Well, I’m not going to beat around the bush.  The finale centred solely on Luann’s Cabaret Show which I will get to but first, we must talk about EVERYONE…. namely Dorinda.  You know what? no… NO, she comes last because there is just SO much to say.  In fact, I will start with Luann’s show.  Much like Bethenny, I was pleasantly surprised.  Did I say surprised? I meant relieved.

Watching Luann ‘rehearse’ in previous episodes did not instil a lot of confidence in her abilities to entertain but as the show unfolded it became very clear she was literally hosting as in she hired professionals to do the entertaining and she was merely the fodder. I mean yes, she sang her 2 pop songs but she both waited for the crowd was well lubed up and for literally everyone else to warm up the crowd. If  Luann came out cold & sang those songs, I doubt she would have been as well received.  However, she was irreverent and appeared to be in on the joke citing many times her past mistakes.

So as she let us finally know the show was called “Countess and Friends” and friends indeed.  The first celebrity to pop up was Rachel Dratch from SNL.  What has happened to this woman’s career where she is appearing in a C list (I feel I’m being generous) cabaret show is beyond me but she was there throwing out some comedy.  She then had singers and dancers from Broadway.  Before she finished out the evening, she had comedian, Bridget Everett sings her skit.  Now, I remember Bridget Everett from a Whitney Cummings comedy special and she scared me then and she scares me now.  That is part of her draw.  She is a Rubenesque woman who comes out with the energy of a mack truck & slams you with her bravado and you are left wondering what just happened. Before long, she is having Sonja motorboat her and had the same results.  Sonja piped up that she had to hold her breath when she dove in.   As jaw-dropping as she is, you also… can’t look away.  Gobsmacked is the word I like to use.

(If you don’t know who she is from her stand up, Bridget Everett has appeared in both a Girls episode (she was Marni’s make up artist at her wedding) and in the Sex in the City Movie (she was the drunk assistant candidate prior to hiring Jennifer Hudson).

Anyways, everyone was having a great time and when it came time for Luann to sing, the ladies were on their feet, dancing and singing along.  Even her children looked proud of their mother (granted, this is prior to them suing).

So how was everyone else?

Well, let’s take it back to the beginning of the night.  Tinsley invited both Dorinda and Carole over from some pre drinks & cheese.  She lets us know how excited she is to be in the penthouse as she can now entertain and by entertain she means she phones room service and has them bring up a cheese plate that no one eats.

Anyways, I will say that when Dorinda arrived I was stunned.  She did look fantastic.  I kind of dig how her coat matches her hair.  However, I did notice that she is wearing yet another 1 piece jumpsuit.  Why someone wants to get naked to pee is beyond me.

As soon as Dorinda arrives, she dives right into being bitter because John is not invited despite having given Luann all of her dresses for the cabaret show.  This is the other focal point of the show.  Dorinda’s over all pissyness with the Countess.  Dorinda contends that John was not invited and when she phoned Luann for a ticket, Luann said she should have asked months ago.

Tinsley kept it to herself but apparently, Scott, who happens to be out of town, was invited to the show just that week.  Tinsley was afraid of further upsetting Dorinda (don’t blame you) so when Carole arrived, she asked for advice or waited til Dorinda couldn’t hear her and asked then.  Carole thinks she is a zen place and advises that transparency is best and Tinsley should tell Tinsley that John was invited.  Guess what? This only fueled the fire.

Throughout the entire cabaret show, every time Luann changed into a new outfit (and there were many), Dorinda would scream ‘Jovani!’  (and it was nothing but annoying.  Even Ramona gave Dorinda a side eye and she is usually one to get in there and stir the drama.  Once the show completed, it was time for the after party.

Much like we were, Bethenny was annoyed with Dorinda and wondered what was up.  When Tinsley filled Bethenny in, Bethenny didn’t think that anything was awry but rather it was more of an oversight.  So when the Countess arrived, she ran up to clear the air.  Luann entered the after party lighter then air with a huge smile on her face (bordered smug if you ask me) but happy nonetheless.  When Bethenny asked about John, Luann went dark.  She couldn’t believe this was an issue. She went on to explain that John was always welcome to attend the event but not at that VIP table and she didn’t have the time or the attention to rectify the situation hours before the show.

Ok, so I have held back my opinion but here it goes.  I too don’t understand why John wasn’t invited.  I too would feel shaded. Thing is, Dorinda didn’t just start dating John yesterday. She has been with him for several years so why wouldn’t it be assumed he would attend?  Luann said she didn’t think about it because most of the ladies were single but you bet your ass if she was still married & that happened, she would have been pissed off.   From how Luann explained everything, it sounded like miscommunication but it seems too weird for that to be the case especially as she went and invited Scott after the fact.  It was her show, if she wanted more people at that table, she could have on top of which, Dorinda did buy Luann all of her outfits.  It was…. weird.

On the other hand, Dorinda acted nothing less of tacky.  Yelling out “Jovani” is disruptive to those around you and doesn’t make anyone see your side. Bitter isn’t a good look on her and she should have been more gracious.   So Dorinda arrived at the after party & informed the ladies that she was pissed and on her way out.  Everyone breathed a sigh of relief as they didn’t want Dorinda melt down 3.0.  However, on her way out she got to talking with Bridget Everett.  This managed to distract her enough to get another glass of wine (nice shade from production btw). So when Luann arrives, Dorinda is ready for a confrontation.  She didn’t so much yell at Luann as she congratulated her on the show but back handed her at the same time.

To be honest, I see Dorinda’s side but I’m just done with her.  All she has done all season is be mad. She was originally yelling at Sonja over her family crest and that she was divorced. She then went to Puerto Rico and yelled at Bethenny.  We end the season with her eviscerating Luann in Colombia and being pissy here.  She has issues.  Whether or not she has a drinking problem is to be determined but I do think there is an underlying darkness to her.  I no longer enjoy watching her on the show.

Someone else I no longer enjoy watching is Tinsley.  I can’t with her mainly because she has no sense of reality.  This is a 43 year old woman that is still be supported by men or family. We were told they have broken up since filming and she has moved to another hotel apartment.  I think she lives in a hotel because she doesn’t know how to take care of herself.  So all that wedding dress fitting and egg crying was for nothing.  She is back to square one and I highly doubt there is a man out there that is watching this & thinking, they want to take her on.

Sonja however, is still delightful and I mean, we know Sonja beats to her own drum but she doesn’t take the whole thing too seriously which I find refreshing.  While nothing may have come of her toaster ovens, she does have her shoe line.  What I’m more shocked by is that she has an entire clothing line too. Anyways, if you all recall, Sonja was to appear on stage with Luann and boy, did she.  So much like the previews, we see her wrap dress fly open during Money can’t buy you Class.  What I can’t figure out is if Sonja untied it or if it was an accident.  I rewound it several times but they don’t actual zoom in on Sonja until she is half naked.

What stood out to me this season was how long they filmed.  We started before Christmas and ended with the Cabaret show which must have been well into March if not April.  That is nearly 6 months of filming.  I say this because it seemed like a couple of the ladies had thin story lines and Sonja was one of them.  While she was at every event, there was little I could say happened.  She started the season dating Frenchie, and ended with another acronym boyfriend.  She has a shoe line we spent no time talking about other than Dorinda yelling at her.  She hosts a gay evening and she rented out her home.   Now that I list this, I realize it is alot more then what Ramona could say.

While Ramona is a RHONY staple, what could you say was her storyline aside from renovating her Hampton home and launching a skin line that neither has products or a website?  Yes, she has battled with Bethenny but that isn’t different than any other season which brings us to the finale.

Just when Carole and Bethenny are sitting down like 2 civilized friends catching up over drinks, does Ramona B Line it over to interrupt.  Bethenny tries to shake Ramona off, by asking for a little more private time between her and Carole. Annoyed, Ramona asks what Bethenny needs?  5 minutes? Should she make an appointment?  Bethenny, not deterred points out that Ramona had wanted them to be friends and now that they are, Ramona is interrupting. Ever afraid of being irrelevant, Ramona decides to unload onto Bethenny, with Carole present mind you, that Bethenny isn’t a supporter and it was insulting that she didn’t show at the launch party. Bethenny, ever tired of the pretend product launches, rolled her eyes and walked off leaving Ramona with Carole and Carole dishes the best piece of advice.  Carole advises that Ramona needs to lower her expectations of Bethenny and perhaps see her for who she is.

To be honest, this is probably the best piece of advice no matter who you are speaking about.  Ramona seems delighted by this idea and is placated for another season.

Last but not least are Bethenny and Carole.  At the end of the show, they seemed to be on relatively good terms.  They are getting along like the old friends they are.  This of course, changes next week at the reunion. I don’t know if the 2 of them watched the previous season and grew angry with one another or if something specifically happened to further derail their crumbling friendship but either way, all signs point to dramatic for the 3 part reunion special

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